nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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