I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize