he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
