That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Welp...herpes.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
