In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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