So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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