Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
