True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
