Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
