Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
