in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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