I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
