last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
only you would photoshop your dick
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize