i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
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