do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
handjob tips. give me some.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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