I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
