the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Randomize
