I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
