I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
