so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
