The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
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