When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize