everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
