Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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