you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
