I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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