Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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