Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
