I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Randomize
