i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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