Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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