i jhust puked up my retainher.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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