She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
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