Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
