I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize
