I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
