I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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