...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
pray to the hookup gods
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
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