She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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