I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
