He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
