Kiss
Puke
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
the room spins SO much faster in panama
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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