Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
bring money and cleavage
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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