hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
He? As in you personified your dick?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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