all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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