That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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