dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
