i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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