He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize