i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
