She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
